What Do You Do When......

From the time you hear your baby's first lusty cry you are blessed with the incredible job of being this little person's protector. A formidable job, to be sure and one that gets harder as your little people grow. It is a relatively easy task when they are small. They're hungry, or wet, or tired and they cry. You feed, change and settle them to sleep and all is right in their little worlds. As they grow the job description changes slightly.

Gone is the simple solution, their hurts take more skill to heal, but a lot of things can still be made better with a band-aide, a hug or a cookie. But what do you do when a cookie can't fix their problems and a hug doesn't heal their pain? Nothing prepares you for the moment when you can't fix what is bothering your little person. Some of these situations even call for the 'protectors' to step back and wait as their young ones flounder about. Nothing prepares you for the helplessness you experience when you can no longer make it all better. In order to raise responsible, respectful children we sometimes have to watch from the sidelines as they take their lumps, endure natural consequences and begin to learn to 'fix' their own hurts.

I don't know who this frightens more, the child or the parent. I seem to be experiencing this in spades this year. My daughter is unhappy in school for the very first time and I can only help her cope with home support and platitudes that, "we can't always love our teachers" and "next year will be better." My son is the peacemaker who wants everybody to like him and despite his best efforts and noble intentions, one little classmate remains elusive. They're both learning valuable life lessons and I've been downsized from protector to pained observer and silent cheerleader.

The song Life Is A Highway comes to mind right now. Not every journey is a smooth one, but it brings us slightly closer to where we want to be. As they journey, I'll always be right beside them, just as a back seat driver.