Do I or Don't I?

I am blessed with time off over the summer months, but sometimes time off translates into time to think. And this, my friends, can turn a blessing into a curse.

Do I or don't I? That is a loaded question. Do I sand and re-mud the drywall in my basement? Do I strip the wallpaper panels and out-dated boarder from my dining room and living room walls? Do I buy a new car? In the summer, with time to weigh the pros and cons, time to contemplate and time to procrastinate I don't accomplish all that much. Why do I need the pressure of work deadlines and commitments to force my hand and light a fire under myself?

I don't have a suitable answer. "Because I just do" doesn't quite pass muster. However, it is the truth. Acknowledging this weakness in myself is a big step. I could trace this quality back through university and the frantic writing of essays in the wee hours of the morning before an assignment was due. I can trace it back to high school and the manic cramming before exams. When did this need for pressure in order to perform develop in me? Your guess is a good as mine. I don't see this quality/affliction in other members of my family. Maybe they possess it and just hide it better than I can. Whether or not I am alone in this, I figure knowing my weakness is half the battle. I need to look on the bright side; I've got the rest of the summer to think on it!